Editor’s Note: During the Month of February 2020, we will be posting blogs about the beauty that God instills in us. I hope these words bring to light what beauty truly means to these women of faith, and that the Lord speaks truth to you about the beauty in your life.
My due date was only 2 days away! The hot July sun had made that ninth month of my first pregnancy miserable in our little farmhouse on the plains of West Texas. Just as my husband and I were eager to bring our baby home, I was also just as eager to drop this baby weight and feel like myself again. I’d married my college sweetheart at age 21, and being a mom had been my life dream, but now at the ripe age of 23, as I looked in the mirror, I hardly recognized the girl staring back at me. I weighed more than I’d weighed in my entire life. Determined to get quickly back into shape, I had accumulated an arsenal of exercise equipment and loaded my VCR with mommy/baby weight-loss videos. I would whip my body back into shape right after I popped this baby out!
The next morning, my heart was racing as we drove the 45 miles to the clinic for a checkup. Little did I know that it wasn’t just the excitement of the long-awaited due date making my heart pound. As the nurse checked my vitals, I sensed her concern. The doctor was summoned, and I began to hear words I’d only read about in my prenatal books…. preeclampsia, fetal stress, toxemia.
What was happening?
It’s astounding how quickly our priorities can shift.
An amniocentesis to evaluate the baby’s lung maturity was ordered immediately. Painful for me and very risky for a full term baby, we were advised that sudden movement of an arm or leg in the path of the needle could be disastrous. We prayed hard. Magnesium sulfate shots were administered deep in my hip every four hours. They were excruciating but would hopefully prevent the onset of toxemia, liver and kidney failure, and seizures. Hours after inducing, my water broke containing the baby’s meconium. I remember the fetal monitor beeping irregularly as I was rushed directly to the OR for an emergency C-section.
Our baby boy was born in critical condition. Having ingested meconium into his lungs, the pediatrician was giving him a 50/50 chance. I, too, was struggling for my life. My husband, encircled by our parents, prayed for God to intervene, breathe His breath into our baby boy, and stop the progression of toxicity in my body.
My 40 year adventure in faith was ushered in by that crisis. For on the heels of our crisis that summer came an amazing miracle of healing. Our God is faithful! That baby boy just celebrated his 40th birthday and has two adorable boys of his own. That life-threatening experience early in our marriage knitted my heart together with my husband in a way that has equipped us for the challenges and blessings of 43 years of marriage. Not only did we bring home a healthy baby boy that August, but I also came home with an unlovely, jagged scar. After recuperating, I actually did some of those exercise videos, but over time my vision of myself changed resulting in a life giving paradigm shift.
A Solid Truth took hold in my heart and it is this: I hadn’t just experienced a miracle, rather, our loving God had partnered with me in that miracle of birth both physically and spiritually. And just as my scar represented my physical sacrifice to birth my precious baby, Jesus’ scarred hands had birthed me into adoption as a child of God.
My gratitude for a healthy baby made it possible to overcome my former fixation on the flesh and adopt a mindset focused on growing in spirit.
This paradigm shift has impacted my life every day since. When crises come—and through the past 40 years, they have come—I’ve been gifted the faith to reframe them, taking my thoughts captive and declaring God’s opinion over my circumstances.
I Peter 2:21 says “For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow in His steps.” Are you bearing a scar in your flesh? Or possibly in your soul? Does it remind you of a past crisis? Does the enemy attempt to use for evil what God means to use for your good?
God tells us that we are made like Christ through the things we suffer. That’s probably why he tells us in I Peter 4:13, “Rejoice to the extent that you share in Christ’s sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy!” And always remember, we are not meant to suffer alone. We are to SHARE! Share in suffering.
Can you imagine being so excited by suffering that we actually call up our friends and share because we know God is about to do something amazing?
Friend, hand over your scars today. Try blessing instead of cursing them. Make them an altar where God can be honored and given residence and permission to reign. Then hide in the secret place of His presence and watch the transformation of beauty in your own life take place!
We would like to thank Susan Hurt for writing this blog!