Focus on Blessing, not Impressing

Editor’s Note: It’s almost FALL, y’all!!!! We will be focusing on hospitality for the next few weeks. Hospitality is so much more than what you produce. It’s the warm, welcoming atmosphere, it’s the peace you welcome others into, it’s the attention to the person in front of you, the listening that shows true hospitality. I know you’ll be refreshed and enlightened by the posts we have this month. Happy reading!!

I used to stress any time I knew we would have guests over. Don’t get me wrong, I love people and I am always excited to hang out with both new and old friends. But I would seriously stay up all hours of the night overthinking everything I needed to do to make their visit absolutely perfect. After all, I went to “sister Suzy’s” house last month and she served a gourmet meal and her home was immaculate! And did you see her dining table? Beautiful! You know, like the ones you see in magazines, dressed with center pieces and fine china.

The irony in this is I have worked in the hospitality industry for 20 years. I KNOW hospitality! I work with my staff daily to teach them that although a clean room is very important, what makes a stay memorable is the way the guest feels welcomed and at home. It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection.

So why do I stress so much about inviting someone to my home?

It took me digging into what hospitality really means before it finally clicked and I could apply it to my home life. Because in reality, I am a wife and working mother of 6 kids. I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve set a pretty table and used that china I’ve had stored away for years. And you know what, I’ve learned that is perfectly ok. Let me tell you why.

While I was studying, I came across the Greek word for hospitality: philoxenia. It literally means LOVE OF STRANGERS. It does not mean I must cook a mean filet mignon, or have the shiniest silver. It means I should show compassion, take genuine interest and serve others. Now if you are one of those lovely ladies that can do it all, may God bless you sister. God created us each to be unique in our gifts. I, for one, did not receive that gift. And for those of you that are in my boat, don’t worry. God never said that practicing hospitality would look the same for everyone. He wants you to share your heart.

1 Peter 4:8-9: And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.” Be hospitable to one another without grumbling.

My takeaway from that is we are called to let our hospitality be an overflow of God’s hospitality to us. And by the way, the memories and the friendships you make along the way will outweigh the troubles of the mess left behind. I promise. 

In biblical times, it was not uncommon to invite a stranger in. There were no stigmas on needing to have a perfect home in order to offer drink or food to a traveler. Jesus himself showed us how to actively love people and create relationships over a meal time and time again. And even though it is not specifically mentioned in the Bible, I don’t think He would have walked away just because you served your meal on paper plates.

So my suggestion to you is to keep it simple. Invite your neighbors over for s’mores over the firepit. Ask the new couple at church to join you for pizza and a game night. Take cookies to the new family that recently moved into the neighborhood. And by the way, I am almost positive they are not going to turn them away even if you bought them at the grocery store instead of baking them from scratch. You could even send an encouraging note to your friend that has moved away. Or invite a new mom over for a play date. You know we all could use adult conversation from time to time. And if nothing else, BE FRIENDLY. Sometimes a simple hello can go a long way. Remember, the purpose of hospitality is to fellowship, mentor, strengthen bonds and get to know one another. Don’t focus so much of what would impress your guests, but more on what would bless them.

Mathew 25: 37-40“Then those that are right with God will say, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry and feed You? When did we see You thirsty and give You a drink? When did we see You a stranger and give You a room? When did we see You had no clothes and we gave You clothes? And when did we see You sick or in prison and we came to You?’ Then the King will say, ‘For sure, I tell you, because you did it to one of the least of My brothers, you have done it to Me.’

Today I am planning an evening with friends. I am choosing to intentionally focus on serving my guests, and I’m not stressing over what would impress them. I realize now that even though we drink from plastic cups at my house, my guests still feel loved and cherished. And regardless of the food on the table, it is a chance for simple moments to spark beautiful memories. And you know what? I sleep much better at night too, having peace in knowing I don’t have to stress about perfection. All I have to do is love people like Jesus loves me. 

We would like to thank Misty Rowell for writing this post!

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