“So where do we go from here?” I looked at my best friend through tears, sitting across from me on my dorm bed. “Do we stop being friends?” I am not sure if you have ever had this type of conversation. A crossroads of relationship where you must decide between continuing to grow closer or go your separate ways. No relationship is exempt from this decision. Friendship, dating, marriage, all relationships have this defining moment where we decide whether to push through the hard into something beautiful, or if we gather ourselves up and go our own ways. But sometimes, this moment isn’t a beautiful one. Sometimes it is born from an earth-shattering breaking of trust that leaves us shaken and reeling.
Trust is a beautiful thing when handled with care, but when it’s betrayed, it leaves us bruised and deeply wounded. Like any wound, if not properly and promptly tended to, it can turn into a scar—or worse, an infection. I have heard women proudly proclaim, “I don’t trust anyone,” and “Oh I just have trust issues,” as if it is a badge of protection around their hearts. What we are really doing when we say that is, “don’t get too close, because I will not be hurt again.” Relationship is impossible without trust. Our trust issues don’t end with human relationships, either. Like I said, they can cause an infection of the heart that leads us to a deep mistrust of God.
Mistrust of God causes us to run away from Him and everything He says is good, when we are hurt. It could be a coping mechanism, like scrolling on your phone, gossiping with friends, shopping beyond your means, drinking to numb yourself, or watching/reading porn. It could be allowing your feelings and ruminating thoughts to keep you in anger, sadness, or anxiety. I know I am mistrusting God when I feel a reluctance to approach Him in prayer or to read my Bible, but an easiness to doing any of the above activities. The answer isn’t a coping mechanism, but a wholehearted surrender.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make straight your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6
Surrender is a beautiful letting go of your pain by placing it in the hands of the One who not only created you but sustains your very being. God doesn’t want us to fear the pain of broken relationships; He wants to be trusted with it. When we surrender, what we are really doing is drawing closer to the One who will hold us, heal us, and eventually send us out to help heal the hurts of others. Surrender begins with prayer. Your prayer might be reluctant but as Anna said in Frozen 2 “just do the next right thing.”
This was my prayer that has helped me through a very recent time of mistrusting God. Maybe it will help you too. Take some time to be with God and pray it, as you surrender your everything to Him.
“God, my feelings do not want to forgive the person that has hurt me. I don’t want to let them off the hook. I am so angry and crushed, but I know that You have a plan to change this pain into a glorious purpose that brings honor to You. So, Lord, what my feelings won’t allow for yet, let the blood of Jesus cover. Give me strength to forgive and heal my heart. I love You, Lord. Forgive me for running to convenience and sin instead of You. Give me Your steadfast love and remind me of Your faithfulness. Amen”
We want to thank Savanna Rodriguez for sharing this post.
Women's Ministry 