I’ve always been a person to take on responsibility for things, even when they weren’t mine to carry. In fact, I was so bad that when things went wrong I would take the blame and then murmur and complain to the Lord! The reason I say that is because it carried on into my family after I got married. This festered in my life for years.
Then, in 1990, at 39 years of age, I found out I was pregnant. When Sarah was born we soon found out that she had physical obstacles. Who do you blame? Well, of course, you blame yourself. That’s when I began the “blame game.” It’s all my fault, I was too old, blah, blah, blah! In that place, I forgot to seek the Lord. I forgot to listen to Him. On the outside I looked like the godly wife and mother who cared for her family, but in reality I was caring only for myself. Everything I did, I did for recognition or praise. It was all centered on me.
In that place, though, I cried out to the Lord and He heard me! In that place, I truly began to see that I wasn’t alone; the Lord had not forsaken me. He was there all the time, shining His precious light on areas that I had taken over.
When I realized that I wasn’t in control and began getting my directions for the day from the Lord, my life radically changed. 1 Peter 5:7:
…casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. But resist him, firm in your faith, knowing the same experiences of suffering are being accomplished by your brethren who are in the world. After you have suffered for a little while the God of all grace…will Himself, perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you.
It doesn’t matter if you are a caregiver for a husband, child or parent, you must be in Him. Everything you do must be as unto Him! When I truly received this truth, my life and family was totally restored. Now I can’t imagine my life without my daughter. She has brought so much joy to our lives.
Have I had opportunities to choose my way or God’s way? You bet! I have learned, though, when I go my way it brings exhaustion, frustration, and confusion. Not a good place to be! I then take a deep breath and I think on Jesus. Philippians 4:6 tells me to be anxious for nothing. And in verse 8 –
Whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute…if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.
Jesus is the true caregiver!
This post was written by Beverly Sharp.