hcfwomen

Balance: Health & Wellness

February 16, 2016September 5, 2016by hcfwomenLeave a Comment

3 John 1:2 “Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers.” NKJV

Balance looks different for everyone. Things are constantly being added and subtracted from our lives as we move through seasons. We need to shift the fulcrum in different seasons to find balance; so my encouragement to us is to BE INTENTIONAL. Because our health affects us in such powerful ways (energy, discipline, motivation, etc.), I have discovered that finding balance in this area spills over into every area of my life.

I need something simple and practical, so here are the top 5 things that have helped me personally bring balance to health in my home.

1. What is your why?
I think it’s so important to first ask yourself WHY you want to get healthy. Jonathan and I decided long ago, before we even started having children, that we wanted our family to be active together, to enjoy great adventures together, and to pass on a legacy of health!

2. Keep Nutrition Simple
Eating healthy is simple, but not easy. I have about 10 different meals/recipes we eat on a regular basis. I usually have the things on hand to make these. They don’t have a ton of ingredients. I don’t go to 4 different specialty stores to find ingredients for a paleo dish I found on Pinterest! (ain’t nobody got time for that). Don’t buy what you don’t want to eat. This helps me not drink the 5 Diet Cokes I want to drink every day.

3. Buddy up
The greatest thing that happened to my work out routine was my little work out buddy! She has like-values regarding her health. She pushes me when I’m lazy and don’t want to go, she pushes me in class when I don’t want to work hard, and I do the same for her.

4. Get your entire family on board
My husband and I are on the same page about not only our health, but our kids’ health (most of the time 😉 He helps me stay on point with the grocery shopping, and he helps me cook (it’s actually some of our best quality time when we cook together!) We cook one meal; everyone eats it. Do my kids LOVE Brussel sprouts? Not really, but they eat them, because we explain to them, just like reading or praying, it’s good for them… and they need to obey mom (and adding a little ranch will help almost anything taste a little better 😉

5. Set an active goal
The greatest thing Jonathan and I started doing several years ago is signing up for races! We would train for them together, and run them together! We started with some 5k’s and from there began working our way up! It helps us stay focused on something, and look forward to something besides just another work out! There is a difference between working out and training. Training is typically forward focused and motivated by love, not fear.
Find something you love doing, not something you loathe!

Again, these are some things I found helpful and practical! I still crush an 8-piece at Chick-Fil-A (in fact, I did last nightJ)…balance.

I discovered long ago that being healthy is not merely a season of life or a new trend, it’s a lifestyle and it’s intentional!

This post was written by Kristen Wright.

Love, Marriage

Balance in Marriage

February 8, 2016by hcfwomen1 Comment

As I was thinking about balance in marriage, I tried to imagine what this looks like.

Is it marital equality—where each person does his or her share, where all work inside and outside the home is evenly distributed?

I think the reality of that picture—if we can even fathom it—is as much of a unicorn as the reality of a woman who deftly does it all.

No woman can do it all. And no marriage can be quantifiably balanced.

In fact, I was grateful for the wisdom once shared to me: keeping score (of who has done the most chores, of who works hardest, of who slept the least, etc.) is not worth it. It’s never enough (for anyone), and no one wins.

If I start to feel that comparison creep into my marriage, it’s usually a symptom of something greater—my heart condition.

As a quick disclaimer, let’s be clear that only God can fully satisfy us. If we’re looking for that in our spouse, we won’t find it. If I’m feeling a little self-pity about my “too much to do” list at home, probably I’m not feeling loved. And when I’m in *that* place, I need to check the condition of my heart and remember who I am in Christ.

So, that’s not what we’re talking about today. But I was thinking maybe balance in marriage means making sure each other’s “love tank” is full.

Gary Chapman’s, The Five Love Languages may be cliché by now, but they are all widely accurate for relationships. Below is a list of the languages, but if you’re not familiar with them, you can find a description of each here:

Physical Touch
Quality Time
Acts of Service
Words of Affirmation
Gifts

If your marriage feels out of balance—or if you feel like you need to move the focus of the fulcrum over your marriage in this season, maybe that starts with meeting your husband’s love language.

Howell and I are both big quality time people, so maybe we’re fortunate that our languages speak to each other. And we’ve learned if we schedule too many social nights away, we’ll both feel disconnected and starved for some QT.

But what if your husband craves acts of service? Is there something you can do for him around the house to fill his tank? Make his favorite meal? Help him with yard work?

What if your husband craves physical touch? Can you make time for sex and intimacy—or find ways to sneak in a hug or kiss even if you’re busy cooking dinner or chasing a toddler?

And what if your tank feels low too?

You might ask yourself if you’re putting unreasonable expectations on your spouse. And then communicate to him (respectfully!) what you need.

As with breaking any cycle, the first move is the hardest. But if you feel you need to bring balance back to your marriage, start by first determining what you can do to fill your husband’s love tank.

Do you need to check the condition of your heart today? What is one thing you can do today to fill your husband’s “love tank”?

This post was written by Laura Brandenburg. To read more about her, click here.

Fruitfulness, God's Presence

Oobleck…and Our Hearts

January 8, 2016January 8, 2016by hcfwomen2 Comments

Have you ever done the kid’s science experiment with “Oobleck”? It is a blend of cornstarch and water that defies all explanation. If you squeeze it or punch it, it acts like a solid (think clay or play dough, sort of). But if you release your fist, it immediately melts like a liquid. It may sound strange, but God recently reminded me of this interesting object to describe my heart.

To be honest, the start of this year has been rough for me. I wanted God to join me in my own pity party, but He didn’t. He reminded me that He’s here with me. Then He gently convicted me that I needed to repent of my own selfishness and bitterness, and He allowed me to push the “reset” button on my heart. He brought me to James 4:5-8.

“Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, ‘He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us’? But He gives more grace. Therefore it says, ‘God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.’ Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.”

The word for grace here is charis – God’s “influence upon the heart, and it’s reflection in the life, including gratitude” (Strong’s Concordance). I love this. To me, that means His grace is when He reaches in and gently touches and molds my heart.

I keep imagining this back and forth motion between our hearts and God…
He yearns for my heart to be completely His. So He gently reaches in and touches my heart; He starts to mold my heart and turn it towards Him. If I resist, my heart gets hard, but if I receive, my heart melts…

God wants my heart to melt for him.

Ezekiel 36:26
“And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.”

If you are afraid of what it would be like to truly experience the all-encompassing love of God, maybe it’s time to repent. This is not meant as a punishment…Repentance is a gift. It’s letting go of ourselves and choosing to align our hearts with God, agreeing with how He sees things.

As I read about “submitting” in the James passage, I actually get a picture more like, “Present yourselves therefore to God.” Like Esther before the king. Come and present ourselves with an open heart to Him…Come near, and He always draws us in. His heart for us is good.

When I choose to repent, submit, and trust that His heart towards me is good, I see His heart of love for me in a way I never have before, and His love overtakes me, and my heart melts.

This post was written by Heather Dillard. To read more about her, click here.

Faith, Holidays, Trust

7 Must Wins: Overcoming the Fear of Lack

December 14, 2015by hcfwomen2 Comments

This week is our final installment of the Must-Win series. If you missed any previous posts, you can start with Part 1 here.
As a reminder during this Christmas season: Jesus came so that you do not have to live in the fear of lack, but out of the abundant life that He gives!

Overcoming the fear of lack changed my life.

The fear of lack led me to some ugly places. It motivated me to do things of which I am not proud. It made me feel like I was in a constant state of not having enough and not being enough. You know:

Not smart enough.
Not quiet enough.
Not rich enough.
Not skilled enough as a wife/mother/friend.
Not pretty enough.
Not organized enough.
Not serving enough.

It manufactures lies and pain. The lies sound something like my own accent whispering, “Why don’t you try harder? After all God has done for you how can you be so ungrateful? You are a disappointment.”

The fear of lack waits until I am about to accomplish a goal and then it moves the goal line just a little further out of reach.

God says otherwise.

He says I am complete, whole and lacking nothing. Because I performed well enough? No. Because Jesus Christ went the distance. Through His life, death, burial, resurrection and ascension, He exchanged His righteousness and integrity for my lack.

Now my work is not to grovel. My work is to BELIEVE I am who He says I am.

He bestowed upon me dignity, beauty and worthiness. He says in Christ I am enough and I have enough.

This changes everything. I quit demanding from others what only God can give me. It’s not my husband’s or my kids’ fault I can’t be myself. I choose to show up and be seen because I am enough.

What is at stake if I lose this battle with the fear of lack? Wholeness.

At some point I have to drive a stake in the ground and believe that God is not holding out on me. He truly gave me what I need to do life in this season of life. It’s up to me to engage and take action. Show up. Be seen. Believe that I have something to offer because of who I am in Christ. This is not perfection. This is COURAGE. And it is INSPIRING!

Will I experience failure? Yes. Will I get some sand kicked in my face? Probably.

Am I saying I have to give my life to something I don’t want to and don’t enjoy? No. I’m saying I quit hiding behind excuses for not speaking up and not acting on what God has called me to even when the going gets tough. God extends an invitation for us to come awake. LIVE. Dare greatly in the arena instead of playing it safe as a spectator of my own life.

Friend, your life counts. Your family needs you to engage and quit believing that you’re not enough. Your workplace needs you to show up and let your ideas be seen. Your community needs you to speak up for what is right and decent.

What actions will you take when you believe you are whole, complete and lacking nothing in YOUR life?

This post was written by Jodi Leigh LaFrance. To read more about her, click here.

Giving, Trust

7 Must-Wins: Stewardship

November 17, 2015December 14, 2015by hcfwomen1 Comment

This week, we continue our fall blog series, “7 Must-Wins.” With a uniquely personal twist toward us as women, we will address seven topics that must be understood and walked out in order for us to have success in this life. To start with Part 1 of this series, click here.

At some point, we’ve all asked and answered the question. If I had a million dollars, what would I do with it? And usually it follows with some grand plan to give and help others…right after we go ahead and buy that new car, or boat, or vacation we’ve been dreaming about. The reality is that most of us will probably never be millionaires. The real question is: what will you do with that with which you’ve been entrusted—no matter the number?

That’s what stewardship is all about. How will you allocate the gifts that God has given you? It speaks to more than just finances, but since money is mentioned more than almost any other topic in the Bible, I’d say it’s probably a big deal. It’s a big deal because the way we steward our money says a lot about where our hearts are.

Many of us say things like, “Well, I’ll give when__________.” Fill in the blank. When the babies are out of diapers. When we get out of debt. When the kids are out of the house. But the Bible says in Proverbs 11:25, “A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.” It seems our logic (myself included!!) can be a little backwards in the economy of God’s Kingdom. We think, “I’ll be generous after I prosper.” He says be generous and THEN you’ll prosper!

Here’s the key: It’s all His anyway. He didn’t ask us to be good owners. He asked us to be good stewards. And if we truly see Him as our source, it’s not that hard. After all, spending other people’s money is easy! 😉

Let me wrap this up with a picture God gave me a few years back. I was standing next to a solid white picket fence that seemed to stretch on for miles and miles. Right next to me a tree branch was hanging over the fence with several ripe, juicy oranges on it. I felt like I was supposed to give a couple of these oranges to someone else. But then anxiety set in. “But Lord,” I said, “if I give these two away I’ll only have a couple left, and that’s not going to last long!” At that moment he took me up to a higher perspective. I could see over the fence that this wasn’t just a single branch of an orange tree, but a massive orchard that stretched as far as the eye could see. I realized that all these oranges were available to me, and suddenly, giving away two didn’t seem like a big deal at all. It’s all about perspective.

I know financial hardships are real. And I know that as women, one of the things we crave is security. But we don’t have to live in the fear of lack. When we are faithful to answer the call to give, He is faithful to meet all of our needs.

“Now he who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness. You will be enriched in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God.” (2 Corinthians 9:10-11 NIV)

This post was written by Becca Wilhite. To read more about her, click here.

**To read Part 7, click here.

Faith

7 Must-Wins: True Faith

October 30, 2015September 5, 2016by hcfwomen1 Comment

We are continuing our fall blog series, “7 Must-Wins.” With a uniquely personal twist toward us as women, we will address seven topics that must be understood and walked out in order for us to have success in this life. To start with Part 1 of this series, click here.

My tiny four year old hands grabbed my mom’s face, cupped it and quietly reminded her that “big girls don’t cry.” My siblings and I had gathered around her on the piano bench and just watched her sob. I didn’t know it at the time but my mother had just sent my father off to receive some help for bipolar disorder—by far one of the hardest choices I know she ever had to make as a wife.

Despite my many hours in prayer and fasting, my father still has bipolar disorder. I have spent many years petitioning and bargaining with the Lord for wholeness and healing in my father’s body—I haven’t seen it happen yet.

I don’t know why people get cancer. I don’t know why recently in our media we see photographs of precious children washed up on the beach, or why people who love the Lord are being executed for what they believe. I don’t know why couples struggle to conceive, or why someone throws the towel in on their marriage, or why the widow lost her husband long before they had a chance to grow old together. I don’t know why “bad things happen to good people”—but I do know that my God is STILL good.

I think that it would be super easy to blame all of these unexplainable things on God. But I think as women of faith we have to take a look in the mirror and ask ourselves: Is my belief in God rooted in my circumstances, or in the finished work of the cross? Do I REALLY believe that I was the joy set before him as he endured the cross? Do I REALLY believe that my God is FOR me, and that he will FIGHT for me?

You see, true faith is not believing hard enough, and then once you have prayed enough you get to see the miracle. No. True faith is choosing to believe that he is GOOD even when your circumstances aren’t perfect. Your miracle is that the King of Kings loved you and chose you even in your sin. If we allow our view of God and his goodness to be trapped in a happy ending, we will miss the joy in the journey, and the miracles he provides along the way.

Because even though I haven’t seen my father’s circumstances change, I have seen God as my whole complete father, and allowed healing to take root in my heart. Even though the couple who couldn’t conceive had pain—they adopted a beautiful child who NEEDED a family. When we choose to quit camping out in our misery we will see that our mess isn’t because of God, but that he IS working all things together for our good.

I don’t know where you are today. I don’t know what miracle you are hoping for, or what circumstance you wish would change or go away—but I do know that our God, he is fighting for YOU and working ALL things together for your good—you need only be still. Find joy in the journey, sweet sister. You are not forgotten, and you are NOT alone.

This post was written by Maggie Riley.

**To read part 6 of this series, click here.

Faith

7 Must-Wins: Faith Righteousness

October 21, 2015September 5, 2016by hcfwomen1 Comment

Faith righteousness. WOW what a big topic, I never would have fathomed that these two words could mean so much to my soul. Two simple words when put together can impact a believer to their core.

Faith—is the complete CONFIDENCE in things hoped for and assurance in the unseen.

Righteousness—Right standing between you and the Father, as it should be.

Put it together: Faith righteousness is complete confidence that I am in right standing with my Father, and I have assurance that my hopes and things that are unseen are as it should be between me and Him.

We all accept this free gift of righteousness when we become believers, but along the way, we all starting doubting. We doubt our sins are forgiven, we doubt his love, we doubt we are worthy enough. So we start working out of our own ability and taking things into our own hands, thinking we can earn His love through our works.

In my personal walk, I have had to come to a place of being confident to trust in my faith righteousness during the gaps in my life. What I mean is this: there are circumstances in life that we didn’t plan on, and a gap can be created between you and God. We get hurt, we lose a loved one, or we are in a transitioning season. But we must understand that even when our circumstances are not as it should be, we are ALWAYS as it should be with God. Understanding that, when gaps come our way, we can look up to the Father with complete confidence that we are in right standing with Him, even though the world around us is in complete chaos.

My encouragement today is to believe that you are as it should be. God sent us His Son so we could believe in Him and have righteousness that doesn’t need to be earned. It is a free gift, because he loves us…it is as it should be.

This post was written by Madi Mikael.

**To read Part 5, of this series, click here.

Worship

7 Must-Wins: Worship

October 10, 2015October 21, 2015by hcfwomen2 Comments

Music has always been part of my life. Whether we were singing hymns at church, on a family road trip (where we listened to anything from ‘50’s and 60’s Rock n Roll, Classical, Motown, to college fight songs), or playing the piano, music was always there. Perhaps this is where God began to lay the groundwork in my heart to become a worship leader. Maybe it’s just because I really like music! Either way, music is where worship began with me. Not with Motown or college fight songs, mind you. But when I was 12 years old, I attended church camp and heard (what we in the church world call) contemporary worship for the first time. I was hooked. Because this wasn’t just about singing some songs about Jesus. It wasn’t just about a really cool band, whose members had long hair and tattoos (Um…I had never seen that in church before). I had an experience. In fact, the best way I can describe it is that I truly, purely, experienced the Presence of Jesus. For the first time in my life, I connected with my Savior. I felt alive! Why? Because He is my Life-Source!

In John 4, Jesus encounters a Samaritan woman who was drawing water from a well. It was very unusual for a male Jew to speak to a female Samaritan. In fact, according to the Law, Jesus would’ve been considered “unclean” by drinking from this woman’s vessel. It’s interesting to me that the Samaritan woman is who Jesus tells first that He is the Messiah. According to the world’s standards, she was most unworthy. She had been married 5 times and was living with another man. Why would Jesus reveal Himself as the Son of God FIRST to this person? Because she was dead in her sin. She needed to be connected to her Life Source. Jesus says to the woman, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” (vs. 13-14, emphasis mine). You see, the water we receive from the Father becomes something inside of us…NEW LIFE! Isn’t this good news!?! Why wouldn’t we want to be connected to our Life Source?

When we worship, we become more aware of God’s Presence. God’s not looking for accolades or compliments. He’s looking for our hearts to be connected to His. He loves us SO! His desire is to be in relationship with us at the deepest level.

So what’s music got to do…got to do with it? (Because everything is a song to me…) Music is a vehicle to not only express our worship, but also to touch our emotions. You can hear a song that was popular when you were in high school, and you will literally FEEL what you were feeling during that time in your life. (Which could be good or not so good…) When I hear a college fight song or a Motown song, I immediately think of the many road trips we took as a family when I was growing up…good times. When we listen to someone singing, playing guitar, playing the keys, or even playing a pipe organ (‘cause that still happens), and they are worshipping Jesus, our hearts become vulnerable to the One who created them. Our Creator God is lovingly speaking to us, connecting to us, revealing Himself to us. And when we respond…OH FRIEND…that spring of water wells up inside of us and WE FEEL ALIVE!!!!! Because we ARE ALIVE!!! Praise Jesus!

Jesus goes on to tell the Samaritan woman, “Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks.” (vs. 23)

Are YOU the kind of worshiper the Father seeks? Is your worship observable? Are you aware of God’s Presence in your life right now? Do you recognize that He is revealing Himself to you? Are you connected to your Life Source? Come and take a drink…

This post was written by Allison House. To read more about her, click here.

**To read Part 4 of this series, click here.

Forgiveness

7 Must-Wins: Forgiveness

October 2, 2015September 5, 2016by hcfwomen1 Comment

“I Forgive….”

That may be one of the hardest things to say some days, much less do. Many times it’s so hard to even say that one simple word out loud. I am currently reading the book Lead Like Jesus. The author states that the opposite of forgiveness is judgment. I think I must have re-read that statement 10 times…the opposite of forgiveness is JUDGMENT??!!! Makes sense if you think about it. Forgiveness is very difficult for most of us, but judgment, well that comes pretty naturally….When we feel wronged by another, whether intentional or not, it is so much easier to judge them, isn’t it? We do it in a moment; it’s sadly often my first response.

In that moment it feels good, it feels necessary, it feels justified. Someone pushes my ‘bad mom’ button, my ‘bad friend’ button, my ‘bad wife’ button…well, BOOM, you’re getting judged by me, in my head, all by myself! How do you like them apples?? Well, the problem with those apples, is that they are all ours. Ours to carry, ours to hold, and eventually as all apples do, they rot. We are left with that feeling…rotten apples.

I was reading a verse the other day that I have probably read a hundred times, but for some reason on this particular day, it popped out at me in a way it never has before.

Luke 23:34, “Father forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”

Jesus said those words while hanging from a cross, after being beaten brutally beyond recognition by the very men he was now forgiving. He had been mocked, spat on, ridiculed. He said these words literally feeling the weight of all of humanity’s sin upon him. I can’t even imagine the pain He felt, the agony, the anguish. He knew what he was there to do. He knew why his Father had sent him. He knew his fate was to die so that we might live. He knew He was there to provide a way to forgiveness. He knew those men would have been forgiven, yet He chose to voice His forgiveness anyway. He chose to say those words out loud, not only for them to hear, but for any to hear.

Three incredibly powerful words…”Father, forgive them.”

I have never been beaten, I have never been publically mocked, I have never even been spat on (well, not intentionally anyway). I never have, and never will be, hung from a cross. I have felt embarrassed, I have felt less than, I have felt shame, I have felt unloved, I have felt forgotten, I have felt pain. But, to choose forgiveness, is to choose HIM!! It’s a choice. No one promised it would be easy or happen in a moment. And even to choose forgiveness doesn’t guarantee restoration in a relationship, but it does guarantee restoration in your heart.

So, when the choice is hard, and it seems impossible, I will remember those three words that changed my life forever.

”Father, forgive them.”

This post was written by Kristen Wright.

**For Part 3 of this series, click here.

Scripture

7 Must-Wins: Authority of God’s Word

September 18, 2015October 10, 2015by hcfwomen6 Comments

We are beginning a new fall blog series, “7 Must-Wins.” With a uniquely personal twist toward us as women, we will address seven topics that must be understood and walked out in order for us to have success in this life. As you read, ask the Holy Spirit to open the eyes of your heart to what He has to say. We hope you enjoy this series!

I am very good at memorizing things. This was helpful in college…although whether or not I retained any useful information for more than a week after testing is questionable! It also helped me while growing up in a church and a family that highly valued knowing the Scriptures. I memorized many verses, and even remembered where most of them were found in the Bible. This still helps me today, but I have also learned something else: knowing God’s Word in my head is different than knowing God’s Word in my heart. Knowing with my heart means that I actually take in what God says, and it makes a difference in the way I live my life.

In today’s culture, when everyone else is choosing the world’s way of doing things, choosing to live according to God’s Word means submitting to an authority higher than ourselves. These are not just words on a page. God’s Word is “living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword” (Hebrews 4:12). When God’s Spirit in us opens our eyes to the truth of His Word, it comes alive in our hearts, and we can begin to live out of it.

I used to think that to “walk in the Spirit” (Galatians 5:25) meant I had to force myself not to walk “in the flesh.” But all God is saying here is that as we align our hearts with God’s Spirit, we begin to see the fruit of who He is coming out of us. Because God is love. He is peace. He is joy. That does not come out of striving to “do better.” It comes out of surrendering myself to God and responding to His voice when He speaks to me.

Yes, this may mean correction sometimes. Paul advises Timothy, “All Scripture is breathed out by God and is profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man (or woman) of God may be competent, equipped for every good work” (2 Timothy 3:16-17). Sometimes when I read or hear God’s Word, I am convicted because I know my heart does not line up with God’s heart for me. So I have to repent, and choose to turn my heart to God’s truth. Yes, it is painful to admit that I am wrong. But it is so good to experience the peace of the Holy Spirit when I choose to agree with Him and follow His voice.

So what does this look like in reality? Honestly, it will be different for each person. It is not a formula. I tend to read the same section or chapter of Scripture for days at a time when God grabs my attention with something. For those of you who don’t like to read, you can easily find websites and mobile apps that will read the Bible to you in many different versions. Just start. Ask God to make your heart come alive to His Word. Why? Because this leads us to God’s heart.

This post was written by Heather Dillard. To read more about her, click here.

**For Part 2 of this series, click here.