Wild Men

wild-men-1Even after being raised as the only girl among brothers, this little lady had some eye-opening learning curves to scale as a young wife to a real-live, flesh-and-blood man and a mother of two rough-and-tumble sons. Oh, I should have been used to the constant wrestling, the competing, the bleeding…the frequent stitches, athletic events, and sheetrock repairs. However, when I found myself yoked together with the love of my life and responsible for managing our active household of little lads whom I absolutely adored, I’m afraid my uber-responsible, controlling side rared up and rather ruled the day.

You probably know the feeling. That twitching, worried, hyper-protective maternal instinct kicks in, and we believe with all our hearts that Momma Knows Best in All Things! And what Momma wants is to keep all her babies close and safe and free from trouble, preferably surrounded by bubble wrap.

Now, I’m not going to tell you that I had an instantaneous transformation, laid down all my control issues at the altar, and have walked 100% free all the days thenceforth. What I can say is that my Father God gave me moments of insight and revelation into the masculine heart and soul—and that led me to come into agreement with Him and how He wired these guys we all love.

wild-at-heartReading the book Wild at Heart by John Eldredge was so impactful in that season of my life. I accepted how my husband and sons were designed by God to be aggressive warriors, adventurers, and leaders. For example, they desire to be respected and trusted as they do hard things, carry heavy responsibility, face danger, rise up to meet challenges, and overcome adversity without being rescued or micromanaged by me.

Truthfully, God used all of this revelation to start healing deep places in my own feminine soul as well, inviting me to get in touch with beauty, softness, nurture, comfort, and the freedom of submission in a way I had never experienced until then. I made crazy-wild choices to actually trust my husband’s decisions for our family instead of resisting, learning to lean into his leadership and trusting the Father’s voice in and through him, to me and to our children.

Over seasons of walking with the Lord as a wife and mother, I continue to relinquish my fears to Him when they arise. Basically, I have come to such a solid and peaceful place of faith in the fact that God’s will is for there to be order in our home. I invite you to join me in that place of faith for your home. That order and peace is totally worth fighting for!

What a generous gift that the masculine and feminine hearts are absolutely being restored and healed in our generation, as we continually surrender to the ways of our Father’s kingdom.

This post was written by Jill Brown. To read more about her, click here. 

Surviving the Holidays with Family

family-holidays“Surviving” and “Holidays” seem like two words that do not belong together; however, the reality is that the holidays can be a very difficult time for a plethora of reasons. The holidays can be a not-so-gentle reminder of past hurts involving family members, an opportunity to grieve those that are no longer with us, and a platform to build up more resentment in struggling familial relationships. This season also lends itself to helping us lose focus on the most important parts of Thanksgiving and Christmas: We become inundated with school plays, holiday parties, and shopping. We are both so eager for the holidays to arrive and eager for them to be over.

I want to challenge each of us to approach this holiday season differently. I am such a visual and kinesthetic person. In an effort to shift my thinking and also the lenses through which I am viewing people, I often picture the following scenario: I picture different pairs of glasses. There are clear ones that are my correct prescription, sunglasses with orange tinted lenses, glasses with weird shapes in the lenses, and a pair with lenses that distort objects.

The reality is that the truth of what I am viewing doesn’t change when I use different lenses. Instead, it is my perspective that changes.

As I approach the holiday season, I am asking the Lord to provide me his lenses through which I can view his people. Using his lenses allows me to love those individuals that are difficult to be with during the holidays. His lenses also allow me to identify hurting people during this season and position myself to love and encourage them. I am so thankful that, this holiday season, we can be a church that chooses our lenses intentionally so that we can participate in what the Lord is doing in the most incredible of ways.

We have the ability to shift our thinking from a mode of “survival” to a position of opportunity this holiday season. I am excited and eager to see what the Lord reveals to me as I ask for his lenses.

This post was written by Lindsey Wesley. To read more about her, click here. 

Making a Home: Words for a Care-Giver

My perceived golden years were supposed to be the time when ingathering was finished and I could enjoy the fruits of my many years of labor. The time when most of my bucket list could start happening and I could do the things I had put on the back-burner and told myself I’d do when I got old and gray. Then life got in the way and things didn’t go as I dreamed. My Little Mama’s golden years became tarnished by the patina of Alzheimer’s and she needed a care-giver. My golden years had changed into something totally different than I expected.

In seeking God‘s perspective for this season in my life He reminded me of this promise in 2 John 1,3:

To the elect lady and her children (family)… Grace, mercy and peace WILL be with you from God the Father and from the Lord Jesus Christ…

He reminded me that these words were much more than a salutation. They were HIS words of LIFE to me and that if I received each one and laid claim to them for my own as a daily blessing from Him then I could be who He wanted me to be for my family in this season.

GRACE. MERCY. PEACE. These words have nothing to do with what I do to make my home comfortable for my family….they have everything to do with who I am in my home with my family.

It is God’s grace that helps me when I have to parent my parent to make sure she remains safe and healthy. It is His grace that helps me in the times buttons from childhood get pushed and I want to respond in a defensive, emotional, or hateful way. It is His grace that helps me to be able to walk away from the physical clutter and chaos that this disease brings into a home.

It is His mercy flowing through me that gives me compassion for the times Little Mama comes to me scared because she doesn’t know where her parents or her husband or her puppy is. Mercy for when she doesn’t know where she is or why she is living with me so that I can comfort her and make her feel safe. It is His mercy that lets me know it is okay to be messed up emotionally at times when I get frustrated or when I see the confusion and pain in Little Mama’s eyes.

Most of all I find I can have inner peace because I know I’m doing exactly what I’m supposed to be doing in this season. Honoring my Little Mama and knowing this pleases my DAD. And if I continue to press in to receive and live in these blessings from Him, my home will flow in abundance of what He wants it to be….maybe not Better Homes and Gardens perfect, but God-Perfect….a life-giving, loving, warm, comfortable and safe haven for my family’s spirits.

This post was written by Kitty Shipman. To read more about her, click here

Making a Home: For the Working Wife

Businesswoman Juggling Responsibility

We are kicking off a new topic this month about Making a Home.

As women, we play a vital role in establishing God’s kingdom in our home.

We are carriers of His peace, love, and joy, and our homes should be bursting with the manifest presence of the Holy Spirit.

But when you need to get dinner out of the oven while simultaneously moving over a load of laundry, feeding the dog, and checking your kid’s homework, it sure doesn’t feel like a Sunday morning worship song.

For me personally, I have to battle the excuse that hangs on the tip of my tongue: “But I work too!”

And for whatever reason, this is the most challenging for me when it comes to dinner. Those infamous words that put me in my pain cycle: “What’s for dinner?”

The screaming crazy woman in my head—the one in business slacks and a nice blouse, setting her laptop bag down and taking off her heels—wants to shout, “I don’t know! I work too!”

Any working wives relate?

But my job is to establish my home; in fact, Proverbs 14:1 says,

The wisest of women builds her home, but the foolish, with her own hands, tears it down.

Do you see what power we have in our home?

I’ve also learned that I’m not supposed to build my house alone. I’m not a martyr, falling on the sword of unending laundry and “What’s for dinner?” conversations.

Dinner was my struggle, and all I had to do was tell my sweet hubs how hard that was for me to come home and figure out dinner after working all day.

Our guys want to help—yes, your husband too.

They often don’t know how to help us or what we need.

So, how can I build peace in my home between the hours of 5:30 and 6:30 when dinner needs to supernaturally appear?

Well, I work best with a plan. We plan what we can cook—emphasis on we. We plan what nights will be leftovers or something easy (e.g. hot dogs). We plan what can be pre-cooked and frozen—usually those are the best plans.

We grocery shop on Sunday, and we make a plan for the week. The screaming crazy woman disappears and is replaced by joy and peace.

If you want peace in your home, you’ve got to communicate with your family. Get a cleaning schedule. Create a chore chart. Plan your meals for a week (or a month!).

Whatever you need to do, talk to your husband and do it.

When we establish peace in our homes, we are a blessing to our husbands and our children; we bring God’s kingdom there; we invite the Holy Spirit to move; and we influence His reign in our families.

Don’t you want some of that in your house? I know I do!

This post was written by Laura Brandenburg. To read more about her, click here. 

The Heart of a Wife

man and wifeWhen I was single, I used to dream about being a Proverbs 31 wife. I used to pray and plead with God to bring my husband to me, and in exchange, I promised to strive to be just like her.

I knew how to sew. Check.

I loved to cook. Check.

I feared the Lord. Check.

The problem with my logic was that naively, I was only focusing on the lengthy list of what the P31 wife did, and never really stopped to consider what must have been in her heart. You know, who she really was. When I finally married my husband, Bryan, I quickly realized I wasn’t even close to making good on my promise to God. I identified much more with the contentious woman in Proverbs whose husband preferred to live on the corner of the roof. Can any of you relate?

What if we looked deeper into the story of this incredible Proverbs 31 woman and asked God to show us her heart? When I read about her without zeroing in on her many accolades, I am able to see a woman that, at her core, trusted God completely and was full of faith for her family.

My husband, Bryan, is a farmer, and when we got married, I couldn’t fathom the measure of faith that I would need to be a farmer’s wife. In the five years we’ve been together, I can’t think of very many things that Bryan has asked of me. He is the most giving and caring man I know and demands little from me as a wife. But, the one thing he does consistently ask of me is to have faith. He asks me to pray, often. For him. For rain. For rest. For peace. For us. He knows and understands that when I choose to trust God and have faith for our family, his heart can trust in me.

The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. ~ Proverbs 31:11

Sure, I could make my own lengthy list of what I think the heart of a wife should look like.
Submissive.
Loving.
Honoring.
Gives respect.
Selfless.

But, aren’t these qualities that must flow from a heart full of trust and faith?

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not depend on your own understanding. Submit to Him in all your ways and He will make your paths straight. ~ Proverbs 3:5-6

I truly believe that the most loving thing I can do for my husband is to trust God and receive faith from Him. I’m kidding myself if I think I can trust and submit to Bryan if I can’t first trust and submit to God.

It’s when I’m spent and exhausted, depleted of peace, even fearful at times, that submission, honor, and respect for Bryan have to be forced and if I’m honest, are a burden. However, when I am full of faith, putting all my trust in God, I find that submission, honor, and respect become a mantle. They flow from the heart of a wife that is full and satisfied.

To me, the heart of a wife embodies many things, but in the deepest parts, I believe it holds a steadfast trust in God and a capacity to receive great faith from Him.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. ~ Romans 15:13

This post was written by Amber Curry. To read more about her, click here. 

The Heart of Adoption

adoptionAdoption: the act or process of giving official acceptance or approval to something.

Wow, that definition just makes my heart sing!!! Today, I’d like to share my family’s story with you. My husband (John) and I had a battle with having birth children. We did have our first daughter (Mckenzie) fairly easily, but when we decided it was time to grow our family, it wasn’t so easy. We started seeing a fertility specialist and exhausted every option and emotion we had. One day as we were driving to work, God laid it heavily on both our hearts at almost the exact same moment that he had great plans to grow our family…it just wasn’t in the way we were going. It was adoption, providing official acceptance to a fatherless child. That very day we stopped seeing the fertility doctor, gave it all to our Father, and left it all there with complete peace.

We went from there to CPS and began the licensing process to foster/adopt. The process took a bit of time for us and kind of frustrated us at times, but we held on to the promise that God had great things planned for us!! On October 14, 2010 (my birthday), we were contacted that we had been a chosen home for a 2-year-old boy!! His plan was perfect!! God cares about every detail. That was the best birthday gift I could have ever received, Braydon…our son!!

The moment he walked through the door he called me ‘mommy’ and my husband ‘daddy.’ My heart melted. He knew he was HOME!!!

He has taught us a love that’s different—a truly unconditional love. He has added so much to our lives!! He is OUR son, and our lives have been forever changed by him. You see, the definition of adoption says giving acceptance and approval to someone, and that’s exactly what our son did for US!! He’s made a difference in our lives just as much or more than we have made in his!! He stretches us to grow more and more every day. He’s shown us our Father’s love, the true spirit of adoption!!

If you are struggling today, I challenge you to press in and let God speak to your tender heart exactly his plans for you…he’s a good, good Father!!

God had already decided that through Jesus Christ he would make us his children—this was his pleasure and purpose.

Ephesians 1:5

This post was written by Kisa Luther. 

The Heart of a Teacher

teaching kidsAt a young age the Lord showed me that one of my greatest attributes to spread His Word would be to teach. Today, I have the privilege to teach 2nd grade, and everyday I pray my students leave my classroom being successful disciples for the Lord.

However, my teaching doesn’t stop there. I also have two little boys at home that need to be taught. Everyday they are learning new things, some good and some bad; but that is where I come in, to “weed out” the bad in them. I know sometimes, when a child disobeys, it’s just easier to take away a toy, spank them or give them time-out, and let them be on their way so you can get back to the dishes, TV or work (I have been there and done that too). But we need to remember that our children are precious gifts from the Lord; He chose us as parents to be their earthly teacher.

So I want to encourage you to pull out your Bible the next time your child disobeys and teach them what the Lord says about their sin. Even if your child is little, it is never too early to teach them God’s Word. After you have taught them, have them memorize or repeat the Scripture you talked about (they are also never to young to memorize Scripture), so that God’s Word is stitched in their heart.

Teaching doesn’t just stop with our children, the Lord told us told us to be “fishers of men.” There are people everywhere that need to be taught God’s promise, and opportunities arise all the time for us to teach. We just have to be like David, strong and courageous, and not be scared to teach others about God.

For a teacher to have successful students we must first do two things:

  • Plan, so that we are prepared to teach a lesson, and
  • Listen to others so we know better ways to teach.

Plan a time to sit and read Scripture; plan a time to have Bible study with yourself, your kids, spouse or friends. For us to teach Biblical lessons to others, we must first study the Bible to educate ourselves. The Lord has a plan for all of us. He has a plan for each life that is brought into this world, including His own Son, who died on the cross for us.

Lastly, for us to be great teachers, we have to learn to listen (which for some women can be hard, because we love to talk). I love listening to other teachers’ ideas that they are using in the classroom and incorporate those into my own lesson plans—therefore making me a better teacher. So let’s sincerely listen: listen to our husbands, to our children, that friend at work that may be suffering, and most importantly, listen to what the Lord is trying to teach us—because ultimately He is greatest teacher of all.

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

bio picWe are excited to have Bethany Williams as our guest writer this week. Bethany is a 2nd grade teacher at PCA, and is married to her high-school sweetheart, Cole. Bethany and Cole have 2 kids: Gunnar and Remington. Bethany grew up on the farm, where she and her siblings were raised to work hard and love the Lord.

What do you enjoy doing?
Teaching, crafting, baking, reading, organizing and being outdoors.

What is your favorite Bible verse?
2 Timothy 4:7 – “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.”

What is the best advice you’ve received?
To listen to people who are older and more experienced than me, because I can learn from their mistakes so I don’t have to make them, too.

Surviving the Summer Days

summerOh Summer, how I love you!!!

This is truly my favorite of all seasons…my kids are home almost everyday, it’s warm, full of fun, a wealth of sunshine, plenty of time with family and friends, s’mores (got to have them), an abundance of snuggles and lots of swimming (my family’s favorite).

God has really been working on my heart and showing me how easy it is to get caught up in thinking we have to work to make summer out to be something extraordinary for our kids. We tend to get caught up in thinking our kiddos are missing out if they aren’t visiting Mickey Mouse or zip-lining through a rainforest. In doing that, we get wrapped up so much in trying to make summer perfect that we lose sight of what’s most important–the everyday. 

I don’t know about you, but there is nothing perfect about life!! It’s a mess!! There is baseball schedules, junior high daughter things (need I say more?), unexpected medical bills, trying relationships, toddler silliness, plumbing mishaps…the list goes on and on and there is much work involved in that.

With that all being said, I LOVE imperfect!!! It allows us to slow down and enjoy the little things. It allows time to teach our children how to work through circumstance. It allows us to remove ourselves and remember that life isn’t a snapshot; one day we will see the bigger picture. It allows us time to grow!! It allows time for us to see that Mickey Mouse and the rainforest aren’t that big of a deal after all!!

I know for my family the small and unplanned getaways are the most memorable, most vulnerable, most appreciated times together as family. I challenge you this summer to change your way of thinking along with me and see how our mighty Father works in your family’s heart through it!! I pray this summer is the best one yet with lots of love, growth, patience, relaxing and many unforgettable times!! Let’s not just survive this summer…lets THRIVE!!!

Romans 12:2 (GNT):

Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind. Then you will be able to know the will of God—what is good and is pleasing to him and is perfect.

This post was written by Kisa Luther. 

Vacation

vacationSummers were made for vacation, right?

Jodi Leigh shared great tips for traveling, especially with littles. Being prepared—mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually—is certainly key.

If you’re thinking: “We can’t travel anywhere! We don’t have any money! There’s no time!” my answer to you is this: Make it a priority; it’s worth it!

Vacations offer us a new perspective, rest for our soul, and the opportunity to make memories with our loved ones.

I don’t know why we have to leave town to get that kind of transformation, but we just do.

If you don’t think you have money to spend on vacation, consider this, you’re likely paying for a data plan on a smart phone, a Netflix account and internet, or a cable account—or some combination of all the above.

I’m not suggesting you cancel your cable and take a trip, but we pay for whatever we prioritize.

Howell and I didn’t have a lot of “extra” in our finances during our first few years of marriage, but we were raised in households that vacationed at least once a year. It didn’t have to be anywhere fancy—but getting out of town was a common practice we wanted to continue.

There are plenty of opportunities for vacationing that won’t break the bank:

  • Go somewhere close
  • Stay at hotels or motels that include breakfast
  • Pack lunches
  • Choose cheap entertainment opportunities

The biggest advice I would offer is to plan and save. Sometimes we have a place picked out where we know we want to go, and sometimes we just start to save—putting a few hundred dollars back each month. When we have X amount, we start “shopping” around: Where can we go that includes hotel, gas or flights, meals, etc. for this amount?

We’ve traveled to many great places (London, San Diego, Colorado, the Caribbean—and all over Texas, New Mexico, and Oklahoma, of course!), but the trip with some of our best memories may very well be one of our cheapest vacations.

We went to Fort Davis in our first or second year of marriage. We drove about six hours in the car, so gas was fairly minimal, and we stayed somewhere cheap (but nice enough to include breakfast 🙂 ). Our entertainment included a lot of free things—touring Fort Davis, hiking outside of Fort Davis, hiking Enchanted Rock, and walking around the shops in town.

We have several funny (and some embarrassing) memories from that trip, and I bet the whole weekend didn’t cost more than $300.

If you plan well and manage expectations (as Jodi suggested), then vacations give us a wonderful opportunity to let go of stress, forget about work and the laundry, and make memories with our family.

Your kids may or may not remember the $100 you spend on their shoes or jeans, but they will remember that time you went to Six Flags and ate turkey legs together.

Yes, it’s an investment. Yes, it’s time away from work and other responsibilities (and may require that you delegate). But it’s worth it!

This post was written by Laura Brandenburg. To read more about her, click here

Embracing Summer

bubblesWhen I think about summertime with my children, I kind of imagine a scenic picture of a mom in a precious sundress bouncing down the sidewalk with her children who seem to be smiling ear to ear with a little bit of “What a Wonderful World” playing in the background. However…Yes, I said it. However, this is so not what my life looks like most of the time in the summer. Far too often I look up and it is 11 a.m., I am still in my yoga pants and t-shirt, re-heating my coffee and trying to keep up with the wild circus that is taking place in my home.

Summertime can be overwhelming, and last year I really had to begin praying through how to embrace summer, and I feel like the Lord laid several things on my heart.

1. Work hard/Play hard: I am raising girls to be women—and you may be raising boys to be men- so we work. So we start our day with breakfast and chores. Every morning they are to put away their laundry, hang up their clothes, and help mama unload the dishwasher. I know what you’re thinking—fun summer, mama! However—fun really isn’t ever really fun until you know what work is. Spontaneity cannot exist without structure, so set a schedule and create some responsibilities for your children, because they will be more excited than you can imagine on the random day you throw that schedule out!

2. Partner up: Take the time and initiative needed to get together with your girlfriends. Let others know what you’re doing with your children and do them together. Our children need to see what friendship, and living with one another looks like.

3. Get involved in the community: I feel like sometimes summer throws our budget straight out of the window. I love to take my children out and do things with them—but that can often be expensive. Use your resources. The library is free and has many events for you and your children such as magic shows, petting zoos, or kick off summer parties—there are SO many options in your local community that are cost effective. Do your research and get out into the community!

4. Get outside: I cannot stress this enough. Get. Outside. Go on a nature walk or an adventure! Just this last week we saw a duck that made a nest in our neighbors’ bushes with 4 eggs. The eggs had hatched but left behind their shells as treasures. Engage their imagination and get them some vitamin D as you get outside. Plus side: we always do this right after our chores and my house stays cleaner a little longer!

5. Be Present: No matter what it is you do with your children this summer, be present. You only have 18 summers with them. That’s it! Use your time wisely and be right there in the moment with them. Take their hand as you adventure through summer together!

This post was written by Maggie Riley.